I’ve swapped dozens of cute pet photos, debated whether the drink is called a “fuzzy navel” or a “fuzzy nipple,” and learned the history of someone’s past three marriages, all before introducing myself to those people. I’m terrible with introductions. I just skip straight to the substance. To my benefit, none of those people introduced themselves either. To my fault, this blog has existed for over two years and I have only given you a short, though charming, About Me page.
However late it may seem, in the trajectory of my life, this is a fitting time for an intro. My blog is something I unabashedly disclose when meeting people now (maybe even before mentioning my name). That’s not something I could say two years, or even six months, ago due to a need to separate my blog from my day job… hence the pseudonym: Artemisia FemmeCock.
Two years ago, I was in college, applying to museum internships, hoping to eventually attend a graduate program for art conservation. I had a website under my legal name for my art, plus all the related social media accounts. I felt like I needed a partition in order to have this blog as well as an unrelated career. I want to say that’s how Artemisia FemmeCock was born, but I wasn’t actually formed because of this name, instead I crafted this name to fit who I am.
Artemisia, pronounced art-ah-me-see-ah, was taken from one of my favorite Italian Baroque painters, Artemisia Gentileschi. Generally existing as a woman in the 17th century was tough enough, but she also worked in an almost exclusively male field, endured assault and the subsequent rape trial against her mentor, and produced brilliant, evocative paintings amongst all the bullshit. I would absolutely invite her to sit at my lunch table. On Wednesdays, we wear the blood of the Patriarchy. [Judith and Holofernes by Artemisia Gentileschi]
Originally, “Artemisia” was followed by “GlitterDick” since I will exit life by combusting into a pile of glitter that will be mixed with silicone to form a commemorative dildo in my name (the FemmeCock). However, I rarely refer to my own harnessed genitals as a dick. I use “cock” when I’m talking about dicks and “dicks” when I’m talking about particularly abhorrent humans. Instead, I settled on “FemmeCock,” which feels closer to a personal identity than any label I could select from a Facebook drop-down menu.
Since beginning my work under Artemisia FemmeCock, I veered from my career plan and have been living in an amorphous cloud of “what next?” I still don’t know, but I do know that whatever I do, I want to be comfortable and safe enough to disclose all of me, including AFemmeCock.
I was recently hired by a non-sex-related company, and throughout the interview process, I was open about my blog and how it informs my skills. I understand that this openness is an immense privilege and that it has its limitations. Unfortunately, not everyone sees my blog content as a creative and intellectual portfolio instead of an indecent conflict of interest, but the people who think the former are the people I want to work with, and I’m privileged to have safe opportunities to do so. I’m not ready to entirely merge my legal and my created name, but I’m working on a lifestyle that merges all aspects of me in a comfortable and inspiring space.
Happy 2016 you beautiful FemmeCock readers, I’m wishing you all of the (literal or metaphorical) glitter and dildos in this new year. Thank you so very much for your support.
Gif from a failed Patreon video attempt (aka recording near a busy road/ trying to look chipper in 90 degree heat).